I didn't post last week because honestly, my outline was set to write about something else. However, I can't ignore the current climate our country is in. Most days I am not ok, I am hurting... yet I still try to smile. It's what I know... to always be strong and to keep pushing. Sleepless nights seem to be the norm this week.
I wonder if it’s just me. I have been ridden with anxiety and thoughts plague my mind of losing a loved one. I go from perspiring to crying.. to the agony of losing yet another distant brother.
Breathe in ... 1,2,3.. breathe out 1,2,3.
God, when will this end? I reach for my journal… which has become my place of refuge... I pray while sitting up. I can’t kneel. Words, more like groans, begin to flow uncontrollably.
I am triggered.
Black People across America have been feeling this way not just this past week but for years. 400 years to be exact. Sleeping with eyes wide open.
We didn’t ask to be in this strange land.. yet the same hands that took us out are the same hands that are trying to take us out.
Intergenerational trauma such as PTSD, anxiety and depression have been passed down via our ancestors as a result of nature and nurture. Mental health in the black community is something that has been ignored for too long.
Every time I open my social media or the news I see images of Black People being killed or subjected to violence and hate. I am told that I need to break generational curses and deal with the root of the issue. Issues that I was never given the chance to address. Issues that we did not create, we are held responsible for.
We are told we are too angry and too rough, not realizing what we have endured. Black boys are told they are weak if they cry. Which then results in men who are incapable of properly displaying emotions. Little black girls are not seen with the same level of innocence as their fellow counterparts.
These riots are the symptoms of the response from people that are hurting, frustrated and tired of being forced to be silent.
While we're worried about a pandemic that is disproportionately affecting the Black community due to underlying health disparities which stemmed from systematic racism… which prevented my people from getting proper health care. We are still expected to work and maintain certain levels of professionalism and an amiable demeanor.
We are resilient but we are tired. Overwhelmed.
While we are fighting, advocating for a change in a system that was built against us, let us remember to take care of ourselves. Here are some things that have helped me cope during this time:
Acknowledge how you’re feeling - know that these feelings are normal, expected and valid.
Seek therapy - speaking to a licensed professional, a pastor, someone who is willing to listen and is able to offer sound advice and/or coping strategies.
Journal - write it out. sometimes that’s the best way to communicate when you don’t know how to fully explain.
Surround yourself with loved ones - find people who will support and uplift you during these times. Genuine affection.
Self care - take a warm bath, listen to uplifting music, watch a comedy, give yourself a facial, hike, create visual art, dance, read, meditate, sing… anything that gives you an opportunity to take care of your mind, body, and/or spirit.
Disengage - Take a break from the media.
Get some fresh air - go outside, enjoy the sun.
Be in tune with your spirituality.
Exercise- Releases feel good endorphins to manage depression and anxiety.
How are you feeling and what are some ways that you have been coping?
I’d love to hear from you.
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This is history in real time.
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